Reviews
The Baltimorons
A good Christmas film is like a warm hug with a hot chocolate made just right, rich and comforting, topped with whipped cream and all the trimmings that make you smile. Both are becoming harder to find these days. The Baltimorons is one of those rare gems that deserves a place in people’s yearly Christmas rotation. It is just a shame it was inexplicably released in early October, long before the season has even begun.
The Baltimorons is not like most Christmas films. On the surface, and from the trailers, it may appear to be another cheesy holiday rom-com, but it is much more than that. Under the direction of Jay Duplass, the story carries a darker undertone, and once you look beyond the surface, its real message begins to emerge. It explores loneliness, particularly during a time of year that is meant to be full of warmth and connection, a feeling that quietly affects far more people than we often realise.
Set in the city of Baltimore, the film follows Cliff (Michael Strassner, who also co-wrote the script), a recovering alcoholic who is six months sober after a failed suicide attempt. The opening sequence shows Cliff arriving at his future in-laws’ home with his girlfriend or fiancée, Brittany (Olivia Luccardi), a detail the film keeps deliberately vague. Soon after arriving, Cliff receives a text from a friend about an improv show taking place that night on Christmas Eve, which instantly creates tension between the pair. Not long after, Cliff suffers an accident, knocking out one of his teeth, and sets off to find an emergency dentist.
At the only dentist in the city he can find open, we meet Didi (Liz Larsen), a divorced, straight-talking woman who does not initially take to Cliff’s jokey, light-hearted humour. She simply wants to get him in and out as quickly as possible so she can move on with her Christmas plans. Naturally, things do not go as expected. Didi receives a call telling her that her ex-husband has eloped and is throwing a party that her daughter and granddaughter are obliged to attend, leaving her alone on Christmas Eve.
From there, The Baltimorons unfolds as both Cliff and Didi receive texts and calls from loved ones that remind them of their loneliness, leading the pair on a spontaneous adventure across the city. Their journey provides plenty of laughs and heartfelt moments, from gatecrashing the ex-husband’s party together to Cliff performing his improv comedy show for the first time sober. The film maintains its warmth and gentle humour throughout, moving at a steady pace that allows the audience to sit back and enjoy the story as it develops.
There are, of course, a few morally ambiguous moments. After all, who would want their partner spending Christmas Eve elsewhere? Yet the film does an excellent job of providing the necessary backstories to help the audience understand where each character is in their life, making their actions, however questionable, feel believable.
The real standout elements of The Baltimorons are, without a doubt, the performances. Both Michael Strassner and Liz Larsen deliver memorable turns, their chemistry so natural that you might assume they were long-time collaborators. Although neither has featured in many mainstream projects, they bring a quiet authenticity to their roles that grounds the film. Olivia Luccardi, as the frustrated girlfriend, also impresses, crafting a character you do not actively root against, which could easily have been the case in lesser hands.
The Baltimorons will likely draw comparisons to The Holdovers, particularly in its exploration of loneliness and its gritty, lived-in Christmas aesthetic. While that is high praise given how exceptional The Holdovers is, The Baltimorons earns the right to stand on its own. There are a few cheesy touches within the rom-com storyline, but the film remains true to its deeper and more meaningful themes, even as it reaches its conclusion. My hope is that, as the holiday season approaches, more people will discover what is another beautiful and heartfelt Christmas film.
