Reviews
If I had legs i'd kick you
Motherhood is perhaps the most demanding job anyone willingly signs up for. It is often a thankless role, as mothers are hit with wave after wave of struggles and setbacks, yet are expected to bounce back and carry on as if nothing ever happened. If I Had Legs I’d Kick You may not present anything entirely new, particularly for mothers, but it remains an important and deeply immersive film. For those of us who are not mothers, it offers a striking glimpse into just how challenging that experience can be.
From writer and director Mary Bronstein, If I Had Legs I’d Kick You follows Linda (Rose Byrne), a therapist and mother stretched to her absolute limits as she struggles to care for her daughter (Delaney Quinn), who suffers from an unidentified illness requiring feeding through a tube and constant attention. To make matters worse, her daughter’s condition seems to worsen each day, and the roof of their apartment collapses, forcing them to move into a nearby motel. Linda must cope with all of this alone while her husband Charles (Christian Slater) is away for work and criticises almost every decision from afar. An interesting anecdote is that his job, revealed only in the final act, provides further context to the pressures bearing down on her.
Outside of the chaotic family life, we also see glimpses of her professional world and the challenges she faces with unpredictable clients, one in particular (Danielle Macdonald) proving especially troublesome. While at work, she regularly seeks guidance from her therapist colleague (Conan O’Brien), although his lack of empathy only exacerbates her difficulties. Scenes at the motel provide insight into the coping mechanisms she employs under relentless stress, including drinking multiple bottles of wine or engaging in drug-related extracurricular activities with her neighbour James (A$AP Rocky), which offers a brief, though fleeting, escape from the surrounding chaos.
The list of pressures she faces seems never-ending, but that is precisely the point. Bronstein expertly builds a sense of constant anxiety, filled with cringe-inducing moments as viewers are drawn deeper into the tangled web of her life. As cracks in her wellbeing inevitably widen, the writing captures her deteriorating state in a particularly striking way, creating a steadily intensifying sense of doom. The film moves at a frantic pace that allows neither her nor the audience much space to breathe, ensuring viewers emerge as emotionally and psychologically drained as the characters themselves.
Rose Byrne is already a Golden Globe and Emmy Award nominated actress, and this may well be her finest performance to date. She conveys every shifting emotion with such raw intensity that viewers are fully immersed in Linda’s experience. It is a rare and finely tuned portrayal, one that leaves a lasting impression and truly deserves awards recognition.
The riveting nature of the film demands that the supporting cast deliver their best, and to their credit, they do, with Conan O’Brien and, somewhat unexpectedly, A$AP Rocky standing out. The stern and almost emotionless O’Brien as Linda’s therapist is a far cry from his usual roles, offering an intriguing and captivating presence despite limited screen time. A$AP Rocky, on the other hand, provides a more supportive presence for Linda, and following his role in Spike Lee’s Highest 2 Lowest, his performance here indicates real promise for future projects.
Whether or not any of the circumstances in the film mirror real life, the story will resonate with parents and caregivers who have faced similar challenges. Bronstein has crafted an anxiety-fuelled exploration of motherhood, capturing the exhaustion and emotional strain of being an overworked and underappreciated mother, a subject that feels rarely explored with such honesty in Hollywood.
While If I Had Legs I’d Kick You will likely be a challenging watch for mothers in particular, Bronstein’s drawing from her own maternal experiences adds a compelling human element that will resonate with many. Don’t walk, run to the cinema to see it while you can, because If I Had Legs I’d Kick You is one of 2025’s must watch films.
